Rattlesnake Tails

In meeting Tim, I found a tremendously rare being. Not only in his personality or our chemistry, but also in his politics, especially considering where he came from. He was born and raised a redneck in a tiny town in the middle of Arkansas, by a grandfather who was the

One of the last conversations I had with Tim before his hospitalization was about pride. I'd just gotten an offer for a competitive role I'd worked my butt off interviewing for, and it was a big step up from my previous job. I remember I was

We first met in 2019, on a gay dating app, of all places. His username was macwrestler, I believe. I was in college, in March of my senior year. I had to stay an extra semester but was going to intern in Chicago that summer. He thought I was adorable

There's this saying about change. "No man steps into the same river twice, as it is not the same river, and he is not the same man." That's what love, real love, is like, in my mind. Love is an active process. It changes

The bond two men can share through wrestling is, I believe, the deepest possible form of love. The bond Tim and I shared when we wrestled was indescribable. But I will try to describe it nonetheless. It's such a potent fragment of qualia that it will never leave

Tim always told me I was a wonderful husband, that I made him happy, that I filled our years together with joy. I had a hard time accepting that - what did I offer that was worth loving when I'd been made to feel unlovable by others so

I don't think we have a patron saint of on-time departures and early arrivals. Nor of flight attendants who listen to your fears and comfort you. We definitely don't have a patron saint of roller coaster enthusiasts, or lovers of raspberry Pop-Tarts, or wrestlers. And I

I'm of the opinion that everyone should allow themselves to embrace their inner child, because of how deeply curative and joyous that emotion can be. Tim was always connected with his inner child. Silly, goofy, earnest, sweet, loving, and kind - he had a charm that was truly